Irene WignallWho doesn’t have social media? I bet there aren’t many people out there who haven’t got at least one profile somewhere.
It’s a way to keep in touch with family and friends, it can be a way to promote your business, and it can be a way to just be god dam nosey.
I was a Facebooker. That was my tool of choice for many years. It wasn’t till I started writing that I realised I needed to spread my wings a bit and dip my toes into the murky web.
I decided to go with Instagram, harmless. It’s a way like-minded people search key words that are relevant to them and follow each other. Harmless!
My first time and this is what I encounter;
I get my first Instagram message after my first attempt at a blog, probably talking about my lack of control of The Stinks (aka Ted and Albie).
It’s from a lovely girl who says she’s enjoyed reading my blog and makes small talk. I oblige as I think this is all okay. She then asked for a photo of me? Normal right? As I’m new to Instagram I struggle to send a photo, so she says, ‘its fine here’s my number, WhatsApp me it’s nice to put a face to the name’.
This sounds acceptable, but naive maybe – I’m a cop for God’s sake – I send a WhatsApp photo and the conversation continued there.
I get slightly paranoid when she compliments me repeatedly, so I slip in the fact that I’m married, and all is great. She sends me photos of her and her husband. Phew, I was barking up the wrong tree, this girl just wanted to be friends.
Then I get a message saying, her and her husband like to spice things up and she likes girls and she likes me. I knew it, I wasn’t being paranoid. I recite the messages to my husband, Adam to which he remarked that I have been flirting with her. Oh my God, I was just trying to be friendly, but yes, re-reading my messages, she says my hair is nice and I reply, so is yours.. Her hair is quite funky, so I say, it’s good to be different. WTF, I had lead her on! The messages go on mostly on her part and in the end, I Google.
‘How do you block someone on Instagram. ‘
You’d think I’d learn but I didn’t.
I went on to write a book and I was told I needed to get myself a decent following across all social media platforms.
I started accepting all friend request, to be fair most were network marketers trying to get me to join their business where I could be a millionaire in the year. No thanks, been there bought the Aloe Vera.
I accepted a friend request from a girl called Emily, straight away she messaged me, “Hi how’s your day going?” to which I thought well if you had looked at my profile you would realise I was having a rather shitty day as my three year has just bum slid down the stairs after having a shite.
I reply “Great thanks”.
Small talk ensued. Then bam, a semi naked photo. I was fuming!! Fuming because I was jealous she looked that great semi naked. Blocked.
If either of them had bought my book then I wouldn’t have minded as much but they didn’t strike me as the reading type.
I’ve tried to be a bit more cautious of who I accept/ follow/ converse with these days and play it safe.
However recently I put a nice ‘normal’ comment on a post and got a Facebook ban for twenty four hours! I’ve never been banned from anything in my life. Apart from Body Shop when I was twelve and stole a white musk bath bomb
Looking back at the comment I may have come across as a bit of a stalker.
I think I may go back to pen and paper life is so much easier that way
